Story of a lonely guy.

Don't get me wrong. I'm not off typing this to gain sympathy, pity, or any kind of reaction from you. All I want you to do is reflect and think. 

I may have a girlfriend, but when it comes to "friends", I'm a fucking loser. Hard to believe, aye? Well, I've had many bros come and go over the past few years, but what I'm really looking for is a group of people I can call my friends. Some call these group of people a clique. If I can be real honest here, I've never really been in a solid and permanent clique. I've been in a few cliques before but I never seemed to stick with them over the long run. I don't know, I actually feel quite unwanted among a group of friends. I still do. It's like I'm a repellent, you know? And this actually makes me pretty fucken' upset and jealous. Upset that I'm being left out. Jealous that they're having a good time without me. All I want is acknowledgement. Is it so hard to acknowledge my fucking existence? Plus, I'm jealous because everyone seems to be with people. Even my girlfriend has her group of friends and it makes me envious to the bone when she goes out with them and I'm left all alone because my only real friend is her. Call me pathetic, call me what you will, because maybe (just maybe), I am. Maybe you're right, I do have no one to talk to in school and all. If I can't help it, and you can't help it, so fucking be it. I'm done with friends and I'm done with cliques. I've come to accept the fact that I actually am a loner. I love being alone, but I hate being left out. So long fair-weather friends. The weather has been fair, but you have not.

PS. The title of the post is a song from blink-182. Fucken' amazing tune, give it a listen.